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Archive for July, 2010

Even the Sportsman Never Drove This Baby

Friday, July 23rd, 2010

If you could drive one car in the world – any one – what would it be?  For me, it’s 007’s Aston Martin.  It was introduced to the world in the third Bond film, Goldfinger.  Not my favorite of the Sean Connery Bonds, (that distinction goes to From Russia with Love) but certainly one of my favorite Bond moments.

Watch the clip, even Connery salivates over this one – although he’s not inclined to show it.

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Slang for Wanker

Friday, July 23rd, 2010


BOCA RATON, FL (Special to TSD After Dark) Spam.  We get a ton of it here at the TSD offices – No, not the canned food product, but SPAM of the unwanted internet junk mail variety.  Lately my inbox has been inundated by ads telling me how I need to spice up my love life with either Viagra or Cialis or a host of other male enhancement products.  What gets me are the headlines, and more specifically all the lovely pet names for penis – or slang for wanker, if you prefer. Slang for Wanker.  I kind of fancy that phrase.  Sounds like an indie band.

Anyway, these are some of the actual terms that have come across the transom that refer to said penis:


Measuring Stick.

Dr. Spank


Crisis Center.

New York Strip.

and…The Butler.

Some admittedly are sharper than others.  But it begs the question, is there any other part of the human anatomy (male or female) that has inspired more pet names?

Imagine it being your job to actually come up with these terms.  Imagine sitting in the office and actually hearing your boss say “Smithers (because that’s the only name they use for the put upon guy with the prick for a boss), I want you to rush out all that discount Viagra spam immediately, and while you’re at it, come up with about two dozen names for dick.”

I’d rather play in an indie band called Slang for Wanker.

Outraged Teens Run Amok!

Friday, July 23rd, 2010

Back in the 70’s companies like K-Tel made millions by selling compilations on records, 8-tracks, and cassettes. It was quite special. Really. No joking. You could find many of your favorite pop hits on one or two big vinyl discs. Unless of course you got suckered into buying anything from TEJ Records with their “remarkable soundalikes.” Just brutal. Even the commercial from 1974 bit the big one.

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With Dinner or a Nice Cigar This Weekend – An Education on Shiraz

Friday, July 16th, 2010

Need the perfect compliment to a nice grilled steak or maybe just a good weekend cigar? Do it right with a nice Shiraz. Here’s a little backgrounder on what’s in the bottle.

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Death Doll

Friday, July 16th, 2010

A few year’s after Twilight Zone’s infamous Talking Tina and several years before the horrific Chucky, there was this – a real, honest to goodness child’s toy from Remco.  To see this thing rocking in the corner in the middle of the night just might be the thing that would permanently drive the sane over the brink.

Behold…Baby Laugh A – Lot

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Twelve Year Old Boy Builds Crude Thermo-Nuclear Device in Basement; Declares War on Bully Next Door

Friday, July 16th, 2010

Put Up Your Nukes. This treehouse is part of little Brent Jewell's demands.

Put Up Your Nukes. This treehouse is part of little Brent Jewell's demands.

SHAVERTOWN, PA (Special to TSD After Dark) Brent Jewell, is not your typical bullied twelve year old. He is not plotting a Columbine-like event just because he’s felt the wrath of neighborhood ruffian Bernie Chalker a few times too often. He instead is devising a plan to seize complete control of Chalker’s bedroom, basement fort, and treehouse. (more…)