Distant Relative, Smooth Jazz, on Respirator
NEW ORLEANS (TSD After Dark) Jazz, the only true American musical art form, was killed in a hail of bullets, towering indifference, and overall lack of good taste yesterday afternoon in New Orleans. Most of Jazz’s family members, including Bebop, Cool, Post Bop, Modal, Third Stream, Fusion, and Acid were also killed. Jazz was estimated to be 106 years old. Acid survived the initial attack, but later died in transit to the Musical Heritage Medical Center.
A distant relative, Smooth Jazz, barely survived the assault, and remains in critical condition in an unspecified hospital.
“Fuckin’ Smooth survived?” lamented fusion guitar great Allan Holdsworth. “I could make a really tasteless Yoko Ono reference here, but I won’t.” (more…)