Charles Barkley’s Rapid Weight Loss Goes Awry
NEW YORK (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) Former NBA star and current basketball analyst, Charles Barkley’s Weight Watchers® campaign is getting men to rethink their waistlines. But the former Auburn stalwart didn’t expect a side effect that has taken it’s toll.
“I’m thinning out like a motherfucker.” said Barkley. “Nothing fits anymore. My family and friends don’t recognize me. Children run screaming in the other direction when I walk down the street.”
Barkely has lost nearly 290 pounds in four weeks reducing his once intimidating frame to a skeletal 17 pounds.
Weight Watchers® administrators are terrified.
“We didn’t expect this at all.” said Marilyn Stafford, spokesperson for the weight control organization. “Maybe he’s got the points thing screwed up. I thought I saw him eating a low fat Fudgesicle® the other day.”
Barkley says the repercussions from being essentially a 6’6’‘ mass of bones is a little disconcerting.
“I tried elbowing a dude in a pick up game the other day, and my elbow just sort lodged in his face. It took two guys to pull it outta there. Blood everywhere you looked. It wasn’t pretty.” the former NBA MVP added. “Maybe I need to get myself a couple of pizza pies and sit around for a few days.”
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