Indians-Blue Jays Play Entire Game with One Ball
CLEVELAND (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) In a cost cutting move that has Major League Baseball rethinking certain traditions, the Cleveland Indians played Sunday’s game with just one baseball.
The Indians defeated the Toronto Blue Jays 4-3 earning their first win of the young season in a game that saw their catcher Carlos Santana celebrate this 26th birthday by walloping two home runs. The ball was tossed back at the request of the public address announcer amid a smattering of boos and profound confusion.
“It (the ball) started looking pretty tattered by the seventh inning, but they kept on using it.” said Blue Jays shortstop Yunel Escobar. “But for me it was the look on that seven year old boy’s face when he caught a foul ball. That’s when security wrestled it from his tiny little hands as tears flowed freely and shock reverberated throughout section 232. It was kinda fucked up a little bit.”
It’s the bottom line the budget conscious Indians are concerned with.
“I estimate we saved the team and the league about $462.35 by just using that one ball.” said Indians GM Chris Antonetti. “Granted it made for some awkward, cringe inducing moments, some pretty bitter resentments, and at least a few dozen psychological scars that’ll have to be worked out in therapy, but if every team adopts this new edict, the league can save an estimated 1.3 million dollars a year. Not too shabby.”
The Indians host the Chicago White Sox beginning tonight, and plan on using an enormous community hot dog.