Spurs’ Duncan Admits to Being Intoxicated By the “Melodious Whiff” of Kevin Durant’s Mystery Cologne

Waft Pick. Tim Duncan caught a whiff and it was over.

OKLAHOMA CITY (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) Despite his team leading the best of seven series 2-0, future hall of famer Tim Duncan and his San Antonio Spurs aren’t taking The Oklahoma City Thunder lightly. Duncan admits OKC superstar Kevin Durant’s skills are more than formidable, but it’s his cologne that worries him most.

“Much like being downwind of a rack of St. Louis baby backs on a smoker on a warm and pleasant summer evening, the irresistible waft of Kevin’s cologne was all up in my nostrils the entire night.” said Duncan. “I’m not sure what my man is wearing, but damn, that is some sweet, sweet, smelling shit.” 

Duncan’s teammate Tony Parker, said he too briefly fell victim to the alluring bouquet, but described the fragrance quite differently.

“Lilies of the Valley.” exclaimed the 31 year old point guard. “Takes me back to my childhood outside of Paris when I’d play soccer with Pierre, Jean Luc, and Claude, amidst the blanket of white flowers as mom would prepare a hearty lunch of Baeckeoffe stew and cheese.”

The cologne, the name of which Durant refused to divulge, has a phantom quality about it, as it apparently effects each person differently. Some are instantly transported to a different time, others become disoriented as in Duncan’s case, and still others fall immediately in love with him.

 

 

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