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Phillies Designate Reliever Chad Qualls to Neighborhood Hoagie Shop

Qualls Quelled. Chad Qaulls thinking about slapping some ribeye on an Amoroso roll.

SOUTH PHILADELPHIA (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) Philadelphia Phillies late inning reliever Chad Qualls was given his walking papers on Thursday after allowing another close game slip away, as the Pittsburgh Pirates defeated the host Phillies, 11-7. Qualls, who’s struggled most of the season with a 4.60 ERA was optioned to Joey’s Hoagie Hut on Passyunk Avenue in South Philly.

“Qualls knows how to throw gas on a fire, which works wonders for our flame fired pork and onion hoagie.” said 62 year old Joey Valone, owner of the establishment since 1979. “We’re looking forward to having him aboard.”

Former teammates look forward to visiting Qualls in his new digs. 

“Qualls bit it hard.” said shortstop Jimmy Rollins. “Which is exactly what I intend to do when I sink my teeth into a turkey and provolone with sweet peppers on a hard roll.”

Qualls will get a 10% discount on hoagies he eats after 6pm. The Phillies wrap up their series against the Pirates today.

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