NFL Draft: Jets Select Calvin Pryor and Large Piece of Driftwood

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NFL Drift. This piece of driftwood might set a new standard in the league this year.

NEW YORK (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) Needing help in many areas, and with the 18th pick in the 2014 NFL Draft, the New York Jets selected Louisville Free Safety, Calvin Pryor. They also traded up to select a twelve foot wide piece of driftwood.

“The piece of driftwood wasn’t even on the board, so, yeah, we were a little surprised,” said CBS Sports NFL analyst, Pete Prisco. “But when you break it down, it starts to make sense. This is a very large piece of driftwood, and if properly placed can wreak havoc on the running game. I can see some speedy backs having a tough time trying to elude this thing. I see it laying down a real hurtin’.”

There’s very little background information on the driftwood or its origin. What is known is that it was spotted on Monday off the coast of New Jersey near Asbury Park. “It took five of us to wrangle this puppy, what with it’s jagged edges and such,” said Jets Assistant Strength and Conditioning Coach, Jason Oszvart. “What we’ve got is a real X factor that could be a game changer for us. I look forward to whipping this bad boy into some serious shape.”

The Jets have their eye on three other inanimate objects including a tumbleweed, a cinderblock, and a recently discarded case of Spam®.

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