Posts Tagged ‘Billy North’

Blue Man Group Will Be Inserted as New Phillies Right Fielder

Wednesday, January 19th, 2011

Baseball Blues. Spring training is still weeks away. But Blue Man Group hopes to ignite a fire in Philly.

PHILADELPHIA (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) The performance art organization known as Blue Man Group will man right field for the Philadelphia Phillies for the upcoming 2011 season.

The position has been a point of contention ever since Jayson Werth opted for free agency enjoying a huge payday in Washington when he signed a seven year deal with the Nationals.

“We just needed to place some closure on the right field situation,” said Phillies GM Ruben Amaro Jr. “No offense to Benny (Ben Francisco) or Domonic Brown or Ross Gload, but they’re kind of boring. We’re solid at the other positions, but right field is an issue. Blue Man Group gives us a unit of three athletic, creative, sexually ambiguous, transgender individuals we can rotate in and out and get some solid entertainment value. I’m not too worried about the hitting. It’ll come.” (more…)

Four Out of Five Doctors Agree Reggie is Still an Asshole

Tuesday, September 14th, 2010

Jackass. Reggie Jackson apparently can still deliver the goods.

NEW YORK (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) Hall of Fame slugger Reggie Jackson may have mellowed over the years, but it seems the overall personality traits that often infuriated managers, fans, opponents and teammates alike remain firmly intact. (more…)