Posts Tagged ‘Justin Bieber’

Amped Up Bieber Drives Onto Track at Daytona Speedway; Wins Invitational

Friday, January 24th, 2014
Justin Bieber Spends The Day With His Dad

Bieby, He’s Bold Outside. Justin Bieber seconds after winning at Daytona. “Let’s get some burgers yo!”

DAYTONA BEACH, FL (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) Nineteen year old pop superstar and teenage deity, Justin Bieber, fresh off his arrest for his high speed hi jinx in South Beach, hopped in his rented yellow Lamborghini and trekked northbound to the legendary Daytona Speedway.

Reports indicate the Autotuned® sensation rolled down his window, screamed “fuck yeah!!!” and crashed through a chain link fence. He quickly found himself in the midst of a low level race called the St. Pauli Girl 100 Invitational.

“We’re quite frankly surprised the little asshole was able to win this thing.” said fellow racer, Dale Crowley Jr. “However, given the fact that he only entered the race on lap 88, makes his victory somewhat inadvertent.”  (more…)

Barry Bonds Found Guilty of Having Justin Bieber on His iPod

Thursday, April 14th, 2011

Bonding Through Music. Barry Bonds just can't give up the Biebs.

SAN FRANCISCO (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) — Already found guilty on one charge of obstructing justice – which carries a maximum sentence of ten years in prison – former Major League slugger Barry Bonds will almost certainly face time behind bars for the more serious conviction; having several downloaded tracks by teen sensation, Justin Bieber on his iPod.

“This was one of the prosecution’s eleventh hour tactics,” said Bonds’ lead attorney, Allen Ruby. “And I’m sorry to say it doesn’t look great right now for my client. We just didn’t see this coming. He doesn’t have a previous record, so we’re hoping he’ll get off with time served, community service and having to sing Baby for twelve year old girls.” (more…)