LOS ANGELES (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) The Los Angeles Dodgers have sold the contract of star outfielder, Matt Kemp to twelve year old baseball fan, Timmy Bradford for the sum of eight hundred million Green Stamps.
“Yes, we still take S&H® Green Stamps.” said team Vice President and Assistant General Manager, Basil Slobodan. “Master Bradford apparently unearthed a cache of booklets containing millions of Green Stamps, saved by his grandmother Louise while shopping at the Safeway® on Olive Avenue in Burbank from 1965 until 1981. It was really cute when he walked in with them and wanted to buy out Matty’s contract. How do you say ‘no’ to something like that?” (more…)