MLB’s Summer of Love: New Testimony Cites “Bizarre 60’s Vibe” Created by Bad Batch of Acid-Laced HGHWednesday, May 2nd, 2012
NEW YORK, NY (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) If the vintage Hendrix and Airplane blaring from boom boxes weren’t enough of a tip-off, players staring for hours at belly button lint or a solitary sunflower seed should have set off alarms. A recently added addendum to the Mitchell report, which was originally issued in 2007, includes testimony describing a two month stretch in 2000 when a number of HGH (human growth hormone) users got a lot more than they bargained for.
“Let’s just say it gave entirely new meaning to round trippers,” said a member of the Mitchell committee. “Fortunately the freak-outs were confined to the locker room area. Baseball officials will tell you that no one knew about HGH use, but around this time an unofficial memo was circulated providing instructions on how to bring players down off the proverbial ledge: slap on some Yes, preferably side one from Close to the Edge, give them a warm glass of chocolate milk, and read random passages from childrens’ books in a non-threatening manner.” (In one instance, a practical joker read from William Burroughs’ drug-fueled novel, “Naked Lunch”; two days later the player quit baseball and for the past seven years has been practicing the pan flute from his one room flat in Marrakech.) (more…)