When Irish Eyes Are Smilin'. This smile means you're through.
BOSTON (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) The Boston Celtics are just one win away from capturing their eighteenth NBA championship. The series will shift back to Los Angeles for Game 6, placing the Lakers in a must win situation. But many Lakers have stopped focusing on winning anything after what happened yesterday after their 92-86 loss. (more…)
Twelve Inch J. Magic Coach Stan Van Gundy says the Lakers have no answers for his team's length, width and ability to nail the clutch three-point money shot.
BOSTON (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) Unfairly or not, excitable Orlando Magic coach Stan Van Gundy has been called panic-prone, particularly in tense, late-game situations. Few, however, question Van Gundy’s preparation, as evidenced when he took the unusual extra step of bringing in famed porn star Ron Jeremy to address the team before Thursday’s practice. Many have pointed to the striking resemblance between the two, and Van Gundy thought an informal Q&A with the popular adult film star would loosen the team up as they anxiously await Friday’s game six against the Boston Celtics. (more…)
You've Been Served. The L.A. Clippers were force fed this restraining order before game time.
SACRAMENTO (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) It was a battle of two teams with woeful losing records. The question was – which team would add a game to the loss column? The Sacramento Kings upended the L.A. Clippers last night 116-94. But The Clippers are claiming it’s because the Kings issued a restraining order on their entire team.
“It’s pretty tough to play man-to-man or establish position when you’ve got a court issued retraining order hangin’ over your ass,” said Clippers big man Deandre Jordan. “We had to keep at least eight feet away from each Kings player. The damn score would have been a lot worse than it was if those douche bags had better jumpers.” (more…)
Zero Tolerance. The NBA isn't at all happy with Gilbert Arenas' behavior. But what does he care? He's getting his own show.
WASHINGTON DC (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) After stunning allegations that Washington Wizards teammates Gilbert “Agent Zero” Arenas and Javaris Crittenton pulled guns on each other in the locker room after a dispute over a gambling debt, both players are weighing their options.
Arenas, the more high profile of the two, has been known for years by the James Bond-like alias, Agent Zero. Immediately after news of the alleged gun incident occurred, he was offered his own FOX TV series, simply titled Agent Zero 2010. (more…)
Smokin' Rafer. Rafer Alston discusses the mind games he plays within himself to handle the losing.
EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) The New Jersey Nets, currently mired in the worst season in NBA history with a 3-29 record, are on pace to eclipse (in a manner of speaking) the 9-73 record for futility, still held by the 1972-73 Philadelphia 76ers. (more…)
Outta the Hoop. Corey Adams has been stuck in the same day in 1967 for forty-two years. Here is the last known photo of Adams as he prepares for a college game (circa 1966). He will be transported to 2009 next week and begin an NBA career that’s been stalled for decades.
TRENTON, NJ (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) — Corey Adams is 22 years old, and by his own admission hasn’t been able step out of the 1960’s. But he’s not speaking figuratively. Adams is not a 21st century kid living in the past by listening to his dad’s old Beatles 45’s or watching Get Smart on YouTube. He’s actually stuck in a time-space continuum and has lived the same day over and over, March 12, 1967, for the past forty-two years.
Adams has been able to communicate with those living in 2008 through a tiny spatial wormhole located just behind the tube of Brycreem on his dresser. (more…)
Star Spangled Jammer. Fusion guitar legend Al Di Meola will lay down his lightning fast version of the National Anthem this Sunday at MSG.
NEW YORK (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) “Just look like you care,” said Anthony Bottaro, a diehard New York Knicks fan from Garden City, New York, echoing a sentiment many Knicks fans are feeling these days.
This Sunday, he’ll get his wish. (more…)
Joint Venture. A I in 2002 after scoring some righteous weed.
PHILADELPHIA (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) The Answer has returned. Allen Iverson is once again a Philadelphia 76er. Iverson, known for being a bit of a free spirit, thrilled fans in the City of Brotherly Love with his intense style of play but also infuriated many with his off-court antics including gun possession and marijuana use.
But more open-minded fans, particularly those who enjoy smoking pot before the game, welcome the return of what they refer to as “the diminutive playmaker’s sweet little magic.” (more…)
Numbers Game. Wilt the Stilt showing off the night he scored 100. But, 100 what?
PHILADELPHIA (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) — Next week the most dominant player of his or arguably any era in professional basketball will receive a posthumous honor for his exploits off the court. Wilt Chamberlain, who passed away in 1999, won NBA titles in Philadelphia and Los Angeles and still holds several NBA records to this day, but perhaps no record is more astonishing than the amount of women the Hall of Famer professed he slept with. (more…)
O death, where is thy bling? LeBron James has not only developed a scarily dead-on Swedish accent, but a fatalistic persona that’s really bumming people out.
CLEVELAND (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) — With opening day of the NBA regular season less than a month away, the Cleveland Cavaliers are trying to determine how their superstar forward LeBron James has suddenly taken on an almost total and nearly perfect Swedish accent. (more…)
Flu the Hoop. This unidentified NBA player says he's not taking any chances.
NEW YORK, (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) NBA Commissioner David Stern has “highly encouraged” NBA coaches and players to not shake hands this season before or after games due to the expected high risk of contacting the Swine Flu. (more…)
MEMPHIS (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) Perennial NBA All-Star Allen Iverson announced via Twitter that God told him he should the next chapter of his basketball life will be in Memphis.
“God chose Memphis,” his tweet said to thousands of AI fans. (more…)
