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Posts Tagged ‘U.S. Open’

Rory McIlroy Annihilates Field at U.S. Open; Wins Coveted Pink Panties

Monday, June 20th, 2011

In the Pink. McIlroy is teed up for huge string of successes.

BETHESDA, MD (Sportsman’s Daily Wire Service) 22 year old phenom, Rory McIlroy captured the United States Open Sunday after enjoying record setting rounds of golf throughout the tournament at Congressional.

“At no point did I really think I was in trouble,” said the young pro from Northern Ireland who had an eight shot victory. “I can’t wait to fondle those lovely undies.”

Much like the legendary Green Jacket worn by Masters champions, the lesser known, but equally prized Pink Panties are bestowed in a post tournament ceremony. (more…)

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Roger that.

Monday, September 8th, 2008

Good to see the old Federer emerge from months of uninspired — for him — play.  And add a point if you wanted to see Djokovic spanked and sent packing (just to show my contempt I’m not even going to spell check Djokovic). Tonite’s final against Andy Murray should be something…Murray is playing great tennis, has beaten Roger twice in three meetings and has the all-court game to pose problems.  But I don’t see Federer losing — it would seriously fuck with the narrative (a season of frustration salvaged by an Open triumph in front of an adoring crowd of crazy New Yorkers…though, frankly, the crazy New Yorker thing is a bit overblown. I mean, it’s not like you’re getting rif-raff floating in off the street into Armstrong Stadium hitting you up for loose change. It’s mostly corporate types and tennis obsessives).  

BTW, anyone catch any of the post Nadal match interview with Scotsman Murray? Not exactly the warm and fuzzy type, eh?  But what’d you expect from the land of MacBeth and mournful bagpipes, sunny and slap-happy?

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A-Rod Throws Down

Thursday, September 4th, 2008

If you thought Rudy and Sarah made for a nasty one-two punch, check out some of the trash Andy Roddick is throwing out at his next opponent, Novak Djokovic. Here’s an excerpt from ESPN:

 A reporter was explaining that the Serbian player had complained of an injured right ankle when Roddick cut him off, sparking this charming exchange:

Roddick: Isn’t it both of them? And a back and a hip?

Reporter: And when he said there are too many to count …

Roddick: And a cramp.

Reporter: Do you get a sense right now that he is …

Roddick: Bird flu.

Reporter: A lot of things. Beijing hangover.

Roddick: Yeah.

Reporter: He’s got a pretty long list of illness.

Roddick: Anthrax. SARS. Common cough and cold.

Great stuff. Look, like 99.9% of tennis fans I love Roger – love his game, and particularly the way he handles himself – for a superstar athlete he seems like a human being.  But you’ve got to like it when tennis players talk trash. I’m looking forward to their match – the edgy American vs. the defiant Serb. Now if only they’d get Michael Buffer to bring them onto the court…and Mills Lane to make the calls…with Lamps and Larry at courtside…ding, ding, ding…let’s get ready to rummmmble.

Prediction: Roddick by TKO in four. 

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